You called, I answered and then you left me here.
You are the Faithful One; where are you?
Monday, September 29, 2014
Tuesday, May 13, 2014
Is God Good?
I think this is the scariest question that anyone, believer or non believer can ask. Whether we believe in Him or not, there is a part of us that hopes He is good; bigger, smarter, and more wise than we are. Something groans in our hearts at the devastation in the world. The poverty. The rage. The bereft earth.
Growing up, I couldn't see Him. I was saved at an early age, but it was an intellectual choice spawned from a fear of hell. The culture in my home was rarely one of love, most often one of discipline, punishment, control and violence. I felt like my soul was being slowly robbed of oxygen. God is good? How can God be good when I'm in so much pain?
I'm not going to get into a theological discussion about this. That's for another post.
I also didn't believe that I was good. I yearned to be good, but I felt like goodness wasn't possible for me. Somehow in my infancy I'd signed the contract; relinquishing goodness to those more sweet and malleable than I. No matter how much I tried, it was impossible to please my parents, and infinitely more impossible to please God. I believed every label I was given; rebellious, controlling, moody, unsaved, worthless.
A good friend suggested that I ask God to show me how I was good in my childhood, and to show me His Hand throughout my life.
This took a degree of repentance from my opinion of my past. I had to be open to the possibility that I was wrong. But I was desperate so I asked.
God often speaks to me through childhood books and this was no exception. I heard Him while rereading The Horse And His Boy by CSLewis. The story is about a prince who grew up a slave; in oppression and pain. And his journey to freedom. In this passage Aslan, the Jesus figure, is explaining His part in Shasta's life.
Shasta was a little reassured by the breath: so he told how he had never known his real father or mother and had been brought up sternly by the fisherman. and then he told the story of his escape and how they were chased by lions and forced to swim for their lives; and of all their dangers in Tashbaan and about his night among the Tombs and how the beasts howled at him out of the desert. And he told about the heat and thirst of their desert journey and how they were almost at their goal when another lion chased them and wounded Aravis. And also, how very long it was since had had anything to eat.
“I do not call you unfortunate,” said the Large Voice.
“Don’t you think it was bad luck to meet so many lions?” said Shasta.
“There was only one lion,” said the Voice.
“What on earth do you mean? I’ve just told you there were at least two lions the first night, and …”
“There was only one, but he was swift of foot.”
“How do you know?”
“I was the lion.”
And as Shasta gaped with open mouth and said nothing, the Voice continued. “I was the lion who forced you to join with Aravis. I was the cat who comforted you among the houses of the dead. I was the lion who drove the jackals from you as you slept. I was the lion who gave the Horses the new strength of fear for the last mile so that you should reach King Lune in time. And I was the lion you do not remember who pushed the boat in which you lay, a child near death, so that it came to shore where a man sat, wakeful at midnight, to receive you.”
As I read this I was struck by His presence in my present and my past. I had a cat who did very uncatlike things. And other animals who surrounded me with comfort and love when the people in my life were unsafe. God was present. He wastes nothing.
As I begin to see Him, how I see myself has gradually changed. I loved to question and argue, because I wanted to understand. But I obeyed, not because my parents deserved honor, but because I understood authority. I had a very strong will, but as soon as I discovered truth, I'd set my will towards it. I had a hard time trusting, but I wanted to be teachable, so often I trusted the untrustworthy. I'm not saying I was perfect, but I'm seeing myself as a Child of God.
Often I feel His presence in my daily life. I've had to allow Him to train my heart, but the process was worth it. All I can say now is that He is Good. He is so Good.
Growing up, I couldn't see Him. I was saved at an early age, but it was an intellectual choice spawned from a fear of hell. The culture in my home was rarely one of love, most often one of discipline, punishment, control and violence. I felt like my soul was being slowly robbed of oxygen. God is good? How can God be good when I'm in so much pain?
I'm not going to get into a theological discussion about this. That's for another post.
I also didn't believe that I was good. I yearned to be good, but I felt like goodness wasn't possible for me. Somehow in my infancy I'd signed the contract; relinquishing goodness to those more sweet and malleable than I. No matter how much I tried, it was impossible to please my parents, and infinitely more impossible to please God. I believed every label I was given; rebellious, controlling, moody, unsaved, worthless.
A good friend suggested that I ask God to show me how I was good in my childhood, and to show me His Hand throughout my life.
This took a degree of repentance from my opinion of my past. I had to be open to the possibility that I was wrong. But I was desperate so I asked.
God often speaks to me through childhood books and this was no exception. I heard Him while rereading The Horse And His Boy by CSLewis. The story is about a prince who grew up a slave; in oppression and pain. And his journey to freedom. In this passage Aslan, the Jesus figure, is explaining His part in Shasta's life.
Shasta was a little reassured by the breath: so he told how he had never known his real father or mother and had been brought up sternly by the fisherman. and then he told the story of his escape and how they were chased by lions and forced to swim for their lives; and of all their dangers in Tashbaan and about his night among the Tombs and how the beasts howled at him out of the desert. And he told about the heat and thirst of their desert journey and how they were almost at their goal when another lion chased them and wounded Aravis. And also, how very long it was since had had anything to eat.
“I do not call you unfortunate,” said the Large Voice.
“Don’t you think it was bad luck to meet so many lions?” said Shasta.
“There was only one lion,” said the Voice.
“What on earth do you mean? I’ve just told you there were at least two lions the first night, and …”
“There was only one, but he was swift of foot.”
“How do you know?”
“I was the lion.”
And as Shasta gaped with open mouth and said nothing, the Voice continued. “I was the lion who forced you to join with Aravis. I was the cat who comforted you among the houses of the dead. I was the lion who drove the jackals from you as you slept. I was the lion who gave the Horses the new strength of fear for the last mile so that you should reach King Lune in time. And I was the lion you do not remember who pushed the boat in which you lay, a child near death, so that it came to shore where a man sat, wakeful at midnight, to receive you.”
As I read this I was struck by His presence in my present and my past. I had a cat who did very uncatlike things. And other animals who surrounded me with comfort and love when the people in my life were unsafe. God was present. He wastes nothing.
As I begin to see Him, how I see myself has gradually changed. I loved to question and argue, because I wanted to understand. But I obeyed, not because my parents deserved honor, but because I understood authority. I had a very strong will, but as soon as I discovered truth, I'd set my will towards it. I had a hard time trusting, but I wanted to be teachable, so often I trusted the untrustworthy. I'm not saying I was perfect, but I'm seeing myself as a Child of God.
Often I feel His presence in my daily life. I've had to allow Him to train my heart, but the process was worth it. All I can say now is that He is Good. He is so Good.
Friday, May 2, 2014
The Responsibility of Sight
There is a blessing in knowing the process of God. Because now you can cooperate. -Graham Cooke
I constantly ask God for eyes to see and ears to hear, but I've discovered that those senses comes with added responsibility. As do all His gifts. ;) I am hugely big picture. Often I think of the Church in the sense of the Bride, Big C Church. I have a high value for balance, so if a local body is leaning to one side I push to the other. Only I know what I'm doing so obviously it creates confusion in everyone else.
In maturing, it can be exceptionally difficult to know what to do with the tools He gives us. For myself, I don't always do the right thing with what I see. Most of the time He's wanting me to view it as an invitation to pray with Him. Instead I put my stick in and stir.
Recently something came up that offers big changes. All the variables are in place. It could be epicly big. Does it get me excited? Sometimes. Mostly it scares the shit out of me. Today I'm discouraged and I feel like an idiot. Yesterday I felt amazingly hopeful.
So I was trying to pray and I remembered how the spies were sent into Canaan to assess the land. Joshua and Caleb saw abundance and prosperity, and the other spies saw giants. The people listened to the ten spies and had to wander forty more years in the wilderness.
Graham Cooke says the forerunner spirit searches the earth for those who want to go in front. I realized that all twelve spies were forerunners! They all went ahead of the people! They all saw the same land, but only two chose to focus on what God wanted them to see.
So what I see in front of me is huge, but it is up to me if I choose to look at the abundance or the giants.
I'm going to choose to look at the Promise. And really, it gets easy when I remember I have a huge Lion padding by my side. :D
I constantly ask God for eyes to see and ears to hear, but I've discovered that those senses comes with added responsibility. As do all His gifts. ;) I am hugely big picture. Often I think of the Church in the sense of the Bride, Big C Church. I have a high value for balance, so if a local body is leaning to one side I push to the other. Only I know what I'm doing so obviously it creates confusion in everyone else.
In maturing, it can be exceptionally difficult to know what to do with the tools He gives us. For myself, I don't always do the right thing with what I see. Most of the time He's wanting me to view it as an invitation to pray with Him. Instead I put my stick in and stir.
Recently something came up that offers big changes. All the variables are in place. It could be epicly big. Does it get me excited? Sometimes. Mostly it scares the shit out of me. Today I'm discouraged and I feel like an idiot. Yesterday I felt amazingly hopeful.
So I was trying to pray and I remembered how the spies were sent into Canaan to assess the land. Joshua and Caleb saw abundance and prosperity, and the other spies saw giants. The people listened to the ten spies and had to wander forty more years in the wilderness.
Graham Cooke says the forerunner spirit searches the earth for those who want to go in front. I realized that all twelve spies were forerunners! They all went ahead of the people! They all saw the same land, but only two chose to focus on what God wanted them to see.
So what I see in front of me is huge, but it is up to me if I choose to look at the abundance or the giants.
I'm going to choose to look at the Promise. And really, it gets easy when I remember I have a huge Lion padding by my side. :D
Sunday, February 23, 2014
Strong Willed
When I was a child, James Dobson was the Christian parenting whisperer. My mom read his book, "The Strong Willed Child", and it armed her for the fight. With me.
I'm not exactly sure what I was like as a child. I was quiet and reserved. I heard I was strong willed. I was a thinker. I argued if it didn't make sense, not for the fun of it. Although that's what it seemed like. As a mom I understand that it isn't always easy to explain things to a child, and sometimes it's not the right time. So I give my mom grace.
As I look back over my life, I appreciate my strong will more than anything else. It has been the thing that formed my powerful choices, and my follow through.
When I was six, I gave my life to Jesus. I didn't see any evidence there was a God, but I was morbidly afraid of hell fire. (pronounced hell fahr) ;) The choice seemed obvious to me, so I chose. Then I spent the next ten years forcing my brain to conform to my choice. Because my ability to choose was stronger.
I remember the day I chose Adam. It came a couple weeks after I thought I had chosen him. The first time was because he had kissed me. I had a kiss vow with God. The real day I chose him was the day he showed his heart to me. I didn't look back.
Our culture tries to convince us that we are at the whim of our circumstances and our instincts. Somehow this teaches us that we are powerless in the tide of our feelings or mentalities. But this is not true. For example, lets say I really want to drink an entire pitcher of beer. My brain tells me that that amount of alcohol will cause pain tomorrow. My feelings tell me that it will make me feel better. So then I choose. Going with logic or feelings is not the problem. Rather, it's not realizing that my power was in my choice. I can't blame either, because I chose. Every time I refuse to take responsibility for my choice, I hand over my power to something that was smaller than I.
Making a powerful choice is like designing a career path. This is the way, walk ye in it. It was my sheer stubborn will that has kept me on the path of my choices. I felt like I was betraying myself if I broke a commitment. Today my best choices are no longer held by force of will. Adam is everything I thought I saw back then and more. I am in love with him more and more each day.
I don't really know how to define how my relationship with Jesus has become bigger than reality. I had a friend challenge me to start blogging about how my knowledge and encounter are meeting, and I'm still working on that one. I only understand that I am in love with this Person that makes me more whole and joyous with every passing day. My head understands more and more, but His Presence reminds me I'm a baby. My heart is growing like the Grinch's on Christmas day. God still does not show up for me like I want Him to, but I think He has a better idea of what I need and I trust Him.
In today's sermon, the pastor ended with the question, "Is Jesus Enough"? I have a lot of dreams for myself and my family. Really big dreams. It scares the shit out of me to consider that they might not come true. But when I look at Jesus I know that my walk with Him has no limit, and that my life is just seventy or eighty years at the beginning of eternity. I may dream big, but it's because I'm like Him, and His adventure with me is just beginning.
I'm not exactly sure what I was like as a child. I was quiet and reserved. I heard I was strong willed. I was a thinker. I argued if it didn't make sense, not for the fun of it. Although that's what it seemed like. As a mom I understand that it isn't always easy to explain things to a child, and sometimes it's not the right time. So I give my mom grace.
As I look back over my life, I appreciate my strong will more than anything else. It has been the thing that formed my powerful choices, and my follow through.
When I was six, I gave my life to Jesus. I didn't see any evidence there was a God, but I was morbidly afraid of hell fire. (pronounced hell fahr) ;) The choice seemed obvious to me, so I chose. Then I spent the next ten years forcing my brain to conform to my choice. Because my ability to choose was stronger.
I remember the day I chose Adam. It came a couple weeks after I thought I had chosen him. The first time was because he had kissed me. I had a kiss vow with God. The real day I chose him was the day he showed his heart to me. I didn't look back.
Our culture tries to convince us that we are at the whim of our circumstances and our instincts. Somehow this teaches us that we are powerless in the tide of our feelings or mentalities. But this is not true. For example, lets say I really want to drink an entire pitcher of beer. My brain tells me that that amount of alcohol will cause pain tomorrow. My feelings tell me that it will make me feel better. So then I choose. Going with logic or feelings is not the problem. Rather, it's not realizing that my power was in my choice. I can't blame either, because I chose. Every time I refuse to take responsibility for my choice, I hand over my power to something that was smaller than I.
Making a powerful choice is like designing a career path. This is the way, walk ye in it. It was my sheer stubborn will that has kept me on the path of my choices. I felt like I was betraying myself if I broke a commitment. Today my best choices are no longer held by force of will. Adam is everything I thought I saw back then and more. I am in love with him more and more each day.
I don't really know how to define how my relationship with Jesus has become bigger than reality. I had a friend challenge me to start blogging about how my knowledge and encounter are meeting, and I'm still working on that one. I only understand that I am in love with this Person that makes me more whole and joyous with every passing day. My head understands more and more, but His Presence reminds me I'm a baby. My heart is growing like the Grinch's on Christmas day. God still does not show up for me like I want Him to, but I think He has a better idea of what I need and I trust Him.
In today's sermon, the pastor ended with the question, "Is Jesus Enough"? I have a lot of dreams for myself and my family. Really big dreams. It scares the shit out of me to consider that they might not come true. But when I look at Jesus I know that my walk with Him has no limit, and that my life is just seventy or eighty years at the beginning of eternity. I may dream big, but it's because I'm like Him, and His adventure with me is just beginning.
Friday, February 21, 2014
He Makes Me Brave
Military basic training ingrains three principles into it's recruits; physical strength and endurance, excellence in weaponry, and command structure. Once trained, a soldier is equipped with everything he or she needs; the ability to discern a threat, to listen and obey commands, to work with a team, and to conquer.
The Believer is called to rest in the tension between two positions; to live in peace, and to be a warrior.
1 Thessalonians 4:11 …and to make it your ambition to lead a quiet life and attend to your own business and work with your hands, just as we commanded you.
Ephesians 6:12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.
Revelation 3: 21 He who overcomes, I will grant to him to sit down with Me on My throne, as I also overcame and sat down with My Father on His throne.
We weren't born in a Kingdom just to develop character and then be carried away into the sweet by and by, we were born into an Army of Grace. Jesus broke the power of death, but it is our job to retake the ground that Adam surrendered. Thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven. That prayer cannot be enacted in passivity. It has to be enacted in that tension; the tension between rest and battle.
Some of the day to day crap we go through is self inflicted, and some of it isn't. Make no mistake, whether self inflicted or not, the Enemy is set to sabotage you. And God's plan for you. The battlefield is in the mind. You may not see demons behind every rock, but discouragement is not a heavenly fruit.
Jesus was attacked in the wilderness at His weakest point. The Enemy questioned Who He was, and what He came to do. Jesus didn't get rocked, but I get rocked in this all the time.
Right now this is my biggest fight; Who I am, and What I am supposed to be doing.
God is hard at work in my life; teaching my Who and Whose I am, giving me a lion heart, preparing my hands for war.
Psalms 18:34 He trains my hands for battle, So that my arms can bend a bow of bronze.
Ephesians 6:13 Therefore, take up the full armor of God, so that you will be able to resist in the evil day, and having done everything, stand firm.
Notice that standing firm is the last step. Fight, resist, then stand firm.
Faithfulness and forbearing are amazing fruit, but they make aren't the only weapon we are designed to wield. Is a soldier only trained in physical fitness and then sent into the Enemy's camp? Nope. He puts on camo, a kevlar helmet, bullet proof vest and carries a semi automatic weapon, grenades, a bayonet, a ka-bar knife, and possibly a handgun. He depends on his buddies for strength, and he does exactly what he's been told to do. If he gets overwhelmed by enemy fire, he retreats or hunkers down. But he doesn't go into battle with the purpose of hunkering down. He goes in to win.
I'm practicing the tension; learning peace and learning battle. I'm not going to let faithfulness become passivity. Fighting from a position of rest and identity. He makes me brave. :)
The Believer is called to rest in the tension between two positions; to live in peace, and to be a warrior.
1 Thessalonians 4:11 …and to make it your ambition to lead a quiet life and attend to your own business and work with your hands, just as we commanded you.
Ephesians 6:12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.
Revelation 3: 21 He who overcomes, I will grant to him to sit down with Me on My throne, as I also overcame and sat down with My Father on His throne.
We weren't born in a Kingdom just to develop character and then be carried away into the sweet by and by, we were born into an Army of Grace. Jesus broke the power of death, but it is our job to retake the ground that Adam surrendered. Thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven. That prayer cannot be enacted in passivity. It has to be enacted in that tension; the tension between rest and battle.
Some of the day to day crap we go through is self inflicted, and some of it isn't. Make no mistake, whether self inflicted or not, the Enemy is set to sabotage you. And God's plan for you. The battlefield is in the mind. You may not see demons behind every rock, but discouragement is not a heavenly fruit.
Jesus was attacked in the wilderness at His weakest point. The Enemy questioned Who He was, and what He came to do. Jesus didn't get rocked, but I get rocked in this all the time.
Right now this is my biggest fight; Who I am, and What I am supposed to be doing.
God is hard at work in my life; teaching my Who and Whose I am, giving me a lion heart, preparing my hands for war.
Psalms 18:34 He trains my hands for battle, So that my arms can bend a bow of bronze.
Ephesians 6:13 Therefore, take up the full armor of God, so that you will be able to resist in the evil day, and having done everything, stand firm.
Notice that standing firm is the last step. Fight, resist, then stand firm.
Faithfulness and forbearing are amazing fruit, but they make aren't the only weapon we are designed to wield. Is a soldier only trained in physical fitness and then sent into the Enemy's camp? Nope. He puts on camo, a kevlar helmet, bullet proof vest and carries a semi automatic weapon, grenades, a bayonet, a ka-bar knife, and possibly a handgun. He depends on his buddies for strength, and he does exactly what he's been told to do. If he gets overwhelmed by enemy fire, he retreats or hunkers down. But he doesn't go into battle with the purpose of hunkering down. He goes in to win.
I'm practicing the tension; learning peace and learning battle. I'm not going to let faithfulness become passivity. Fighting from a position of rest and identity. He makes me brave. :)
Wednesday, January 29, 2014
Theology and Encounter
I really like words. Words convey thought. I like finding out exactly how and when a word came into existence and how culture adjusted it's meaning throughout the years. My favorite word website is etymonline.com. It gives me a better understanding of the full implications of a word as opposed to a simple dictionary.
Etymonline describes the word theology as thus:
theology (n.) Look up theology at Dictionary.com
mid-14c., "the science of religion, study of God and his relationship to humanity," from Old French theologie "philosophical study of Christian doctrine; Scripture" (14c.), from Latin theologia, from Greek theologia "an account of the gods," from theologos "one discoursing on the gods," from theos "god" (see theo-) + -logos "treating of" (see -logy). Meaning "a particular system of theology" is from 1660s.
Encounter is defined as:
ncounter (v.) Look up encounter at Dictionary.com
c.1300, "to meet as an adversary," from Old French encontrer "confront," from encontre (see encounter (n.). Weakened sense of "casually meet" first recorded in English early 16c. Related: Encountered; encountering.
I actually thought that encounter just meant 'to meet'. Isn't it interesting that the word originally meant more than a casual meeting?
I've been involved with worship music since I was seventeen. As part of a worship team, and also in the classes I attended in Bible college, I was privy to many views on the purpose of worship. You'd have to go back and study the history of church music to get a full understanding of how it has evolved; I don't want to get into it here. Suffice it to say, it's usually just an argument of old vs. new, hymns vs. choruses, etc. I think one side is always arguing that one kind is holier or more accessible to the congregation.
One of the observations that have been expressed is that many of the songs written today have little theological depth, or even worse, flawed theologically. This is true for many songs. Both hymns and new worship alike. But there are several factors we need to examine instead of deeming something theologically fluffy.
For example, have you read President George Washington's State of the Union address and compared it to President Barack Obama's? I haven't. I've only read excerpts. But the disparity of the language is immense. Today's second grade level verbiage hardly compares to yesteryear's intense, weighty and verbose rhetoric. Some of this is because we are all more stupid. Really. Some of it is because we have found simpler ways of conveying heavy topics. Just because something is more wordy doesn't mean it's saying more. Like this blog. ;)
Theology is just the study of God and His ways. Studying doesn't necessarily lead to KNOWING. I could read a biography about my husband but in no way can that be compared to being his wife and knowing him through close relationship.
I don't mean this to be offensive in the slightest, but for us academic types, studying is the easy way out. It is so easy to sit down with a book, take notes, think a bit and then write a paper. I have read and studied the Bible. I have read countless books written by Bible scholars from centuries before. At the end of the day, my mind has just been filled with words and opinions. I am as close to knowing Him as I would have been reading a biography of my husband.
What are people talking about when they refer to theology? For most, they are talking about an intellectual, cerebral grasp of the God and His ways. Theology doesn't have to be intellectual. I can learn about God through experience. When I experience His goodness, and then read about it in Scripture, it has been confirmed that Goodness is one of the attributes of God. I KNOW it.
I can't KNOW something intellectually. In the sense of belief. What convinces a person that something is true? Is it logic or reason? Or is it a feeling? I can argue for and against the existence of God and achieve a rational argument for both sides. But it is my EXPERIENCE that convinces me that God is real. Feelings aren't supposed to be separated from thought. From a neurological standpoint, feelings are actually hormonal flags supporting other thoughts. We cannot separate them. You can tell me till you are blue in the face that God loves me, but if I have no frame of reference, if all I have known is hardship and abuse, this means nothing to me. Love is only an idea until it is felt. Once it has been experienced, one can start structuring reason on top of it. If it is not experienced, your mind can be changed be a better argument. The structure of truth on top of experience is crucial however, because once the experience has past, your present feelings can influence your mind.
From a worship leader's standpoint, should I lead the people in songs that are theologically accurate? Of course. Should I teach them about God through the songs? Of course. Should they have theological depth? Come on, what does that even mean? Does that mean we should get out our pens and paper and take notes and look into the Greek and perhaps delve into commentaries to see the different opinions of the (supposedly) more learned scholars?
One cannot convey depth academically. Words merely convey thought. Not heart.
What they can do, is open a door. Words are an invitation; depth is a process of walking further in.
Not everyone learns academically or intellectually. In fact, spiritual depth can be communicated simply. In a sentence, spoken over and over. How is that?
Revelations 4:8 Each of the four living creatures had six wings and was covered with eyes all around, even under his wings. Day and night they never stop saying: "HOLY, HOLY, HOLY IS THE Lord GOD ALMIGHTY, WHO WAS, AND IS, AND IS TO COME."
For infinity past and infinity to come, they sing the same thing. Why? I personally think that every time they circle around the throne they are aware of a new aspect of His holiness. Now that's depth. Ever closer, further in, higher up.
I feel that leading the Body in worship should be a combination of three things;
1. Know your flock. Understand where they are spiritually. Neither discount the immature or the mature.
2. Create an atmosphere that blesses God. God inhabits the praises of His people, and He shows His presence in the place where people are hungry for Him. Make God and His agenda foremost.
3. Choose songs that invite. You can't lead people into a place you haven't been. Seek His face. Spend time in private worship. The songs don't have to be theologically complex to teach. Simple is best.
Last but not least, we cannot separate theology from encounter. If encounter is first, it needs to be followed with knowledge. If knowledge is first, it must be followed by encounter. Being a friend of God doesn't mean being a bookworm. ;)
Etymonline describes the word theology as thus:
theology (n.) Look up theology at Dictionary.com
mid-14c., "the science of religion, study of God and his relationship to humanity," from Old French theologie "philosophical study of Christian doctrine; Scripture" (14c.), from Latin theologia, from Greek theologia "an account of the gods," from theologos "one discoursing on the gods," from theos "god" (see theo-) + -logos "treating of" (see -logy). Meaning "a particular system of theology" is from 1660s.
Encounter is defined as:
ncounter (v.) Look up encounter at Dictionary.com
c.1300, "to meet as an adversary," from Old French encontrer "confront," from encontre (see encounter (n.). Weakened sense of "casually meet" first recorded in English early 16c. Related: Encountered; encountering.
I actually thought that encounter just meant 'to meet'. Isn't it interesting that the word originally meant more than a casual meeting?
I've been involved with worship music since I was seventeen. As part of a worship team, and also in the classes I attended in Bible college, I was privy to many views on the purpose of worship. You'd have to go back and study the history of church music to get a full understanding of how it has evolved; I don't want to get into it here. Suffice it to say, it's usually just an argument of old vs. new, hymns vs. choruses, etc. I think one side is always arguing that one kind is holier or more accessible to the congregation.
One of the observations that have been expressed is that many of the songs written today have little theological depth, or even worse, flawed theologically. This is true for many songs. Both hymns and new worship alike. But there are several factors we need to examine instead of deeming something theologically fluffy.
For example, have you read President George Washington's State of the Union address and compared it to President Barack Obama's? I haven't. I've only read excerpts. But the disparity of the language is immense. Today's second grade level verbiage hardly compares to yesteryear's intense, weighty and verbose rhetoric. Some of this is because we are all more stupid. Really. Some of it is because we have found simpler ways of conveying heavy topics. Just because something is more wordy doesn't mean it's saying more. Like this blog. ;)
Theology is just the study of God and His ways. Studying doesn't necessarily lead to KNOWING. I could read a biography about my husband but in no way can that be compared to being his wife and knowing him through close relationship.
I don't mean this to be offensive in the slightest, but for us academic types, studying is the easy way out. It is so easy to sit down with a book, take notes, think a bit and then write a paper. I have read and studied the Bible. I have read countless books written by Bible scholars from centuries before. At the end of the day, my mind has just been filled with words and opinions. I am as close to knowing Him as I would have been reading a biography of my husband.
What are people talking about when they refer to theology? For most, they are talking about an intellectual, cerebral grasp of the God and His ways. Theology doesn't have to be intellectual. I can learn about God through experience. When I experience His goodness, and then read about it in Scripture, it has been confirmed that Goodness is one of the attributes of God. I KNOW it.
I can't KNOW something intellectually. In the sense of belief. What convinces a person that something is true? Is it logic or reason? Or is it a feeling? I can argue for and against the existence of God and achieve a rational argument for both sides. But it is my EXPERIENCE that convinces me that God is real. Feelings aren't supposed to be separated from thought. From a neurological standpoint, feelings are actually hormonal flags supporting other thoughts. We cannot separate them. You can tell me till you are blue in the face that God loves me, but if I have no frame of reference, if all I have known is hardship and abuse, this means nothing to me. Love is only an idea until it is felt. Once it has been experienced, one can start structuring reason on top of it. If it is not experienced, your mind can be changed be a better argument. The structure of truth on top of experience is crucial however, because once the experience has past, your present feelings can influence your mind.
From a worship leader's standpoint, should I lead the people in songs that are theologically accurate? Of course. Should I teach them about God through the songs? Of course. Should they have theological depth? Come on, what does that even mean? Does that mean we should get out our pens and paper and take notes and look into the Greek and perhaps delve into commentaries to see the different opinions of the (supposedly) more learned scholars?
One cannot convey depth academically. Words merely convey thought. Not heart.
What they can do, is open a door. Words are an invitation; depth is a process of walking further in.
Not everyone learns academically or intellectually. In fact, spiritual depth can be communicated simply. In a sentence, spoken over and over. How is that?
Revelations 4:8 Each of the four living creatures had six wings and was covered with eyes all around, even under his wings. Day and night they never stop saying: "HOLY, HOLY, HOLY IS THE Lord GOD ALMIGHTY, WHO WAS, AND IS, AND IS TO COME."
For infinity past and infinity to come, they sing the same thing. Why? I personally think that every time they circle around the throne they are aware of a new aspect of His holiness. Now that's depth. Ever closer, further in, higher up.
I feel that leading the Body in worship should be a combination of three things;
1. Know your flock. Understand where they are spiritually. Neither discount the immature or the mature.
2. Create an atmosphere that blesses God. God inhabits the praises of His people, and He shows His presence in the place where people are hungry for Him. Make God and His agenda foremost.
3. Choose songs that invite. You can't lead people into a place you haven't been. Seek His face. Spend time in private worship. The songs don't have to be theologically complex to teach. Simple is best.
Last but not least, we cannot separate theology from encounter. If encounter is first, it needs to be followed with knowledge. If knowledge is first, it must be followed by encounter. Being a friend of God doesn't mean being a bookworm. ;)
Wednesday, January 22, 2014
Lies and Desire
I was taught that desire was evil. Unless it was something of God or of some practical use. Like, if I desired to be kind. Or if I desired to wash the dishes. All good. Any other desires might be fueled by pride, a need for attention, or just a mistaken view of the harshness of the world. Don't hope for anything, because disappointment is crushing.
Growing up I always wanted to sing. I'd run through the pasture singing The Hills Are Alive, or America the Beautiful. I was sheltered from pop music so I didn't sing Like a Virgin. I guess that's a blessing. I was so hungry to sing, but I questioned that desire with every ounce of my being. Here's my check list:
1. I want attention
2. If I'm meant to sing, I'd have a great voice.
3. I don't have a great voice
4. If I'm meant to sing, I'd do it anywhere at any time and all the time. I'd wait till I was in private.
5. Anything I want can't be from God.
Eventually I shut all that down in order to pursue voice in college. But I developed acid reflux from stress and entirely lost my voice. So, I took that as a sign from God; He doesn't want me singing.
After years of pain during singing, I came to a moment in worship that required a decision. Basically, I said, "Screw this, God! I'm going to sing and worship you! Even if it hurts! At least I'd give my last little bit to you instead of reserving my voice for me." And for the first time in my life, I felt God touch me.
That started a long process of faith. My voice often hurt, but not nearly as bad. I began practicing, took vocal lessons, and set my feet towards Him. The funniest part was that I still hated my voice. I had a friend tell me I sounded like Julie Andrews. That cut me to the quick. I didn't want to sound like Julie Andrews. I wanted to sound like Adele. :)
I started singing in a worship team at church. That was trippy. Here I didn't like my voice and I had to hear it magnified by the mic, through the monitor and into the mains. Happy happy joy joy. (make sure you enter sarcasm there)
I was scared every time. It sucked. But do you know what? After a long period of time, only one of my two major truths remained. I wanted to sing and I hated my voice. Which one do you think was allowed to stick around? :)
I'm still not particularly brave. I'm working on it. I still don't think my voice is fantastic, but I don't hate it. Know why? Because I've got the only one. God made only one of me. There is only one voice fully mine, and if that's how I'm going to express myself to my Jesus then so be it. If He is happy with my voice, then I will be too.
Desire is not bad. Finding out where the desire will lead you can be a bit tricky, but if you hand it fully to Him, the path is fulfilling and brilliant.
May your every moment be filled with desire and passion. May you set your feet towards the Author and Perfecter of your faith. :)
Growing up I always wanted to sing. I'd run through the pasture singing The Hills Are Alive, or America the Beautiful. I was sheltered from pop music so I didn't sing Like a Virgin. I guess that's a blessing. I was so hungry to sing, but I questioned that desire with every ounce of my being. Here's my check list:
1. I want attention
2. If I'm meant to sing, I'd have a great voice.
3. I don't have a great voice
4. If I'm meant to sing, I'd do it anywhere at any time and all the time. I'd wait till I was in private.
5. Anything I want can't be from God.
Eventually I shut all that down in order to pursue voice in college. But I developed acid reflux from stress and entirely lost my voice. So, I took that as a sign from God; He doesn't want me singing.
After years of pain during singing, I came to a moment in worship that required a decision. Basically, I said, "Screw this, God! I'm going to sing and worship you! Even if it hurts! At least I'd give my last little bit to you instead of reserving my voice for me." And for the first time in my life, I felt God touch me.
That started a long process of faith. My voice often hurt, but not nearly as bad. I began practicing, took vocal lessons, and set my feet towards Him. The funniest part was that I still hated my voice. I had a friend tell me I sounded like Julie Andrews. That cut me to the quick. I didn't want to sound like Julie Andrews. I wanted to sound like Adele. :)
I started singing in a worship team at church. That was trippy. Here I didn't like my voice and I had to hear it magnified by the mic, through the monitor and into the mains. Happy happy joy joy. (make sure you enter sarcasm there)
I was scared every time. It sucked. But do you know what? After a long period of time, only one of my two major truths remained. I wanted to sing and I hated my voice. Which one do you think was allowed to stick around? :)
I'm still not particularly brave. I'm working on it. I still don't think my voice is fantastic, but I don't hate it. Know why? Because I've got the only one. God made only one of me. There is only one voice fully mine, and if that's how I'm going to express myself to my Jesus then so be it. If He is happy with my voice, then I will be too.
Desire is not bad. Finding out where the desire will lead you can be a bit tricky, but if you hand it fully to Him, the path is fulfilling and brilliant.
May your every moment be filled with desire and passion. May you set your feet towards the Author and Perfecter of your faith. :)
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