Thursday, December 1, 2016

Peacekeeping and Peacemaking

After the recent election, the amount of fear and anxiety I saw in social media really concerned me. When I asked one of my favorite leaders what to do about it, her reply was to receive peace and give peace. Last night I woke at four am and started thinking about all the weapons that I've learned to wield in my battle for my mind and heart and how that has affected my life. At four am the words in my head seemed profound, but I don't remember most of them so I'll just start with a list. :)

1. Forgiveness.
           Forgiveness is the most beautiful gift. How selfless did Jesus have to be to die, sinless, so that we could be forgiven? No punishment. Instead, restoration of relationship. For me, forgiveness has had to become a lifestyle choice. It's not a little thing. For those of us who have experienced abuse, oppression, etc, it feels wrong to forgive. It seems like the opposite of what should happen. Relinquishing the need to demand a debt paid. But in this upside down Kingdom, it's the only way to have freedom. My soul is my own. I don't want to spend another second letting bitterness, fear, and anguish wreck my joy. This is a path that is not fully possible without God. Not only does He heal, He restores and brings us on the other side with more than we had. Like the Hebrews leaving Egypt with riches.

2. Thankfulness
          This used to be impossible for me. I looked at my childhood and just felt a huge gaping hole. I had no happy memories, only trauma. To be thankful felt like a farce. How could God ask me to be thankful when I had nothing to be thankful for? Scripture tells us to be thankful in everything, not for everything. So undoubtedly it's a substance not contingent on circumstances or things. I started practicing thankfulness. I just started thanking Him. Even when I didn't feel it. Even when I felt like I was going to throw up. You know what happened? All that junk, that bitterness, that scar tissue, the horror....started to break up like arctic ice in the spring. I started feeling positive feelings for the first time ever. Real joy. Whenever I get locked into my performance anxiety, thankfulness is my first weapon of choice.

3. Rewriting my brain.
            This is a follow up on the first two. We have control over our thoughts. Some of our thoughts aren't ours. Some of our thoughts are the fruit of wrong belief systems. BUT!! We can change how we think. If the thought doesn't lead to joy, to hope, to vision and to love, then it is not our best. When I have thoughts that lead me into negativity, fear, anxiety, hopelessness...then I ask God what I am believing. Once I see the lie, then I ask Him what His truth is. It's always better. It's always life giving. And it always comes with the grace to rewrite the old junky way of thinking.

4. Changing how I speak.
               This is a follow up on the third. :) Out of the heart the mouth speaks. What are we saying? Our words reveal what we believe about God, the world, ourselves and each other.

5.  Worship
               Worship is one of the biggest weapons I have. Spiritual warfare doesn't have to be all crazy and loud and sweaty. It can just be elevating His Name over the situation. Giving Him glory. Adoring Him. He's a good father. He's my best friend. He's my comforter. Everything has to bow before Him.

So the first five weapons I listed are foundational. It's about creating good ground; pulling out the weeds, chucking out the rocks, and planting the right stuff. It's about learning to have peace, and to keep it. To rest in Him and what He says about me. To know the truth and to walk in it. This next tool I want to talk about is something I recently discovered. But before I tell you what it is, I want to talk about peace making. Recently my daughter came to me and said, Mom, peace is better than war. I said, You're right. And sometimes we have to have war to make peace. I always think about peace making like pulling out the big guns. Maybe a Colt 45 Peacemaker... ;)
This last year I battled anxiety in the wee hours of the morning. I'd wake up and not be able to sleep. I tried my other weapons; worship, prayer, etc. It was a fight. Too much of a fight. Then one night I realized that I was fighting defensively, not offensively. Did I not know Whose I was? It was like I was fighting on my back. I mean, I was because I was in bed, but I was on my back in the spirit.

So I call my most recently discovered weapon, My Roar. At three am in the morning, I got angry. All of my insides swirled up and roared at my anxiety. IT FELT SO GOOD. I am strong, because He is strong. I am perfect because He is. I am whole. I am forgiven. I have grace. I have joy. I WILL TAKE THIS LAND. AND THEN I WILL GIVE IT AWAY.

I want you to live the fullest, most healthy, most joyous life possible. I say that because I KNOW HIM. That's what He wants for you. Stop living on your back. Address your soul soil. FIGHT! WIN!




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